Why the Vagus Nerve Matters So Much for Mums-to-Be and New Mums

Pregnancy and early motherhood are often described as joyful, but they are also times of vulnerability. Your body is learning a new rhythm, your identity may be shifting, and your nervous system is constantly responding to new demands.

The vagus nerve plays a key role in what’s sometimes called the ‘rest and digest’ response. Your calm state of mind when you’re sleeping or feeling relaxed, safe and secure. When it’s well supported, it helps the body slow down, regulate the heart rate, aid digestion and support emotional balance. When it’s overwhelmed, the opposite can happen and the body stays on high alert.

For expectant and new mums, this can help explain experiences such as feeling wired but exhausted, having a sensitive stomach, feeling tearful or snappy, or finding it hard to switch off even when the baby sleeps. These aren’t personal failings or signs that you’re ‘not coping’. They are often signs that your nervous system is doing its best to keep you and your baby safe. But if there is no true threat you need to learn how to get that message to your nervous system so it can stand down.

Understanding the vagus nerve can help you be kinder to yourself.

Learning about the vagus nerve helps you reframe these symptoms with compassion. Rather than asking, “What’s wrong with me?”, the question becomes, “What might my body be responding to right now?”

Support for the vagus nerve doesn’t need to be complicated. Moments of connection, with your baby, a partner, a friend, or even yourself, can gently nudge the nervous system towards calm. Eye contact, shared laughter, or being listened to without judgement all send powerful signals of safety through the vagus nerve.

This understanding can be especially helpful for mums who feel guilty for not enjoying every moment. Your nervous system isn’t designed to feel calm all the time, particularly during such a life-altering chapter.

Go gently and listen to your body and what it needs. That may mean cancelling plans sometimes or asking for help. This can be difficult at first but pushing through is harder.

Rose

Try to listen to your body and what it needs rather than pushing through because you think you should.